Frustration

Here is a moment of frustration, as scored LIVE by me on a piano. 

The Vegetarian

The vegetarian got down onto the hallway carpet and scrubbed pathetically at the blood caked in it's fibers. 

She knew that her cats where't vegetarian like she was (God, she'd tried) but until recently they'd been content with having their dinner from out of the can. The vegetarian had found a small wood-mouse in her spare-room a few weeks-back, not moving, which one of her cats had been mewing towards in expectation of praise. Not received.  The vegetarian buried the mouse in the back garden, and placed a large plant pot over the plot to stop the foxes.

It looked like there had been a struggle on the stairs. As well as the dark red blotches on the carpet, there were also Pollockian flingings of red across the cream walls & a soggy maroon puddle on the sofa. The vegetarian assumed it had been a pigeon or something, considering the height. The poor thing must still be in there somewhere, she reckoned. 

The water in the vegetarian's bucket had turned grey, so she took it downstairs to the kitchen and emptied it in the sink. As the water spiraled down the plug-hole, the vegetarian looked out of the kitchen window. Her two cats sat on the wall outside, looking in - waiting patiently. Domestically. Her two cats only waited on the wall when the windows weren't open. 

The vegetarian reached out for one of the knives by the sink. 

Based on a true story. Written by Jen Ives. 

Swedish Style Balls - POEM

Swedish Style Balls
Oh Quorn Meat Balls, what are ye?
Your box promised delicacy 
I'll question for eternity 
This oxymoron mystery

a poem by Jen Ives

Some Pictures #1

I take pictures sometimes (on a camera, not out of people's homes). They're not all that or anything, but this is my blog and anyway, I wasted a whole three hours walking around getting these shots, so I've got to put them somewhere don't I?

Here are some of them, if you're bothered: 

They're alright aren't they? Not the worst you've ever seen, but you wouldn't buy one. Anyways, slideshow's over now, you can go if you want. 

Ricardo

I'm not much or a singer, but every now and then a cause comes along that's so important I feel I have to jump on the piano and lend my voice out to the World. That is why today, I release this video to help find Channel 4's star of the reality TV series The Salon Ricardo Ribeiro. 

We miss you Ricardo. Please come home. 

Lyrics:

RICARDO

Oh Ricardo

Where are you?

Ricardo

We miss you

You did that advert

For TRESemm'e

It made our day

Ricardo

Are you in your Salon?

Ricardo

Do you drive a van now

For Ocado?

We won't judge you

Ricardo

Because we love you

words & music by Jen Ives - 2015

Berlin Walls

You hear a lot about the Berlin Wall, but you don't hear much about all the other walls the city has to offer. Sure, they might not have played as much of an important role in Germany's history, but we shouldn't forget that there are still plenty of other walls in Berlin, and they're no less walls just because there's this other big, important wall down the road. 

I went to Berlin last year and I saw the Berlin wall, and yeah it was pretty cool and everything (I've seen higher), but I also saw other walls as well, and they had their own unique charms. So, here are a couple of my Berlin Wall highlights from last year. 

They're not the Berlin wall. But they are walls in Berlin. Berlin walls. 

A really nice Berlin wall.

Pretty nice wall, in Berlin.

Carpet Wrong

Every day I have to walk past a carpet shop. I don't think it'll be around much longer as we'll probably be using smart-phones to print off our carpets out of 3D Pacific Rift printers. To commemorate it, I drew this picture of it and wrote a poem... about it. 

CARPET WRONG - an incredibly moving poem by Jen Ives

If you are a carpet shop

Try leading by example

Your carpet, it is hideous

I will not view your samples